11 March 2014

Get da london look


In my tender 19 years of reppin a little thing called life hehe, I have discovered that most areas in London have a sort of uniform. Not everyone succumbs to this bullshit, but many feel that it makes their life more fulfilled or just creates a feeling of 'unity'. Whatever, I think it's funny. Here we go:


1.) Chiswick
'da fuk has he done 2 me?'
Ok, so this is the cute suburby place where as a teen you'd get crunk on Turnham Green, making everyone your BFF 4 e and e and e and e. Let's be honest, it's 'cute' but pretty fucking boring.

The dress code if you're over 40 is anything from Jigsaw, probably 'spiced' up with some Whistles to show you're well off but not an A-Lista, which you'll wear to pick your kids up from Latymer or wear to Fouberts on the weekend. Most dudes will look like hairdressers, in leather jackets, V05d hair and patent leather shoes. Galz will most likely be in Abercrombie and Fitch (so 2008), and probably have braces. You only really see tweens in Chis. Instead of a bag as an accessory, it's a scooter. Big look.


2.) Sloane Square
wut nigguh?


Again, Sloane Square doesn't really scream excitement, but I have a soft spot for it. It has good cafes and it HAD a Frae. Shout outs to Frae, although you are now gone, you are never forgotten. Any way, yeah if you're a dude you're style icon is probably the whole of Bastille. You'll wear a top that says 'Tainted Youth' from All Saints or some shit, with leather jeans and suede shoes. To edge this badass look up, you'll either wear a beanie (controversh) or even a ......charm bracelet. SHIT. Looking cajj is key so you'll want to be on the phone as much as possible. For girls, it's leggings, boots that Kendall Jenner probably owns, a juice or coffee, a black top and a purse. Another common look is a top saying 'geek' on it, with a Cher Lloyd esc gold chain, creepers and probably some pen on your hand saying 'MSFT rep'. swag-g-i. If you're over 30 you like to wear fur, smoke Vogues, own a Chihuahua called Andrea or Donatella, and your husband is most likely an art curator.

3.) New Cross
intimidatin-chic
                                 
So, New Cross is a bit of a dump but I love it. You have Chick Chicken, or you have ChinWag which has, like the best boigerz in the world. It's the hub for Goldsmiths Uni, which is quite in right now. You will often find me there, getting refused to be let in to the Amersham Arms, slut droppin at the New Cross House or jus being swag. hehe. Yesterday I went to the New Cross House and some dude wearing a turban rocked over to us. He was white. I assumed this was a new st8ment or something. Instead he comes over, drunk (in lurv) and says 'fuk religion. I'm a Sikh btw'. Next thing I know he's holding my hand, which were sweaty because I felt uneasy. He says he's an aspiring singer. Next thing I know, he's caressing my palm singing in Indian.
   Anyways, yeah, in New Cross, you're gonna see a lot of hats. I saw some fucking wannabe Heisenburg wearing a black top hat, a beanie saying 'Passe de spliff down' (ratings) and the really unknown and cool 'Carharrt' beanie. Like, get over it. Big up them sweetheartz who HAVE to use their tobacco as a clutch purse, either holding it, or placing it so its popping out of the pocket. Smokin is kl we get it. The other 'look' are school kids downing fried chicken n chips like they've just come off the Atkins diet or summin.

There u have it.

'Remember, da true way to dress is to be yourself.'-Annz Dog

LXXXXXXX

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